What were you doing for those nine months apart from watching your belly grow and enduring the irresistible free kicks from your first child to be?
You were researching more about parenthood, is that so?
Well, were your findings helpful when you finally had your child?
You guessed it right! Not at all!:) Okay, to some extent, yes. But expectations are a lot more different than reality.
You know, you can never understand what life is until it grows inside you. You may read all kinds of materials on how to be a new mom, accept all advice, and prepare the best you can. But when the baby arrives, you can feel clueless about some things about parenthood, and most importantly, how the newborn baby behaves.
Every first-time mom has a story to tell. Even though the tales may vary from person to person, at least they are honest ones. But the fun part is, you can help someone else find strength in knowing your experience.
Anita Diamant once said, Just like there is no warning for childbirth, there is no adequate preparation for the sight of a first child. However, a little information may save a situation.
So, are you curious to discover what I wished to know as a mother to be before having a newborn child?
Let’s get right into it!
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- Love Was Only a Word Before
- Photos Are Good for Preserving Memories
- Listen to Your Mama Instincts
- You Are Not Going To Be Broke
- You Will Need Help
- Don’t Waste Your Time Reading About Pregnancy
- Messes Will Be the New Norm
- Go Easy on Yourself
- It’s Okay To Say ‘NO’
- Try Not To Feel Guilty
- Enjoy every Moment!
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Love Was Only a Word Before
Did you know that when you love someone so much, it hurts?
Then you haven’t had a baby yet:)
What is love anyway?
Of course, it is an intense feeling for liking someone. But you will never understand the magnitude of this fondness until you have a baby.
The love that grows inside you when you have a newborn is something that no one can explain. You need to have kids to understand and feel it truly; you will know how it feels to love someone more than anything else in the world.
Photos Are Good for Preserving Memories
Children grow up so quickly. That cute ‘newborn’ face will last for a few weeks only, and if you are not careful, you’ll miss the newborn phase in no time. But if you take pictures of them often, you will have something to remind you what you and everyone else saw— a wrinkly pink alien baby.
So, don't waste time thinking about how cute your baby is growing every day. Treasure the moments you will be spending together and have photos to keep the memories intact. Don't say no one told you!
*Related: The Struggles Of Parenthood: The Best Advice For New Parents
Listen to Your Mama Instincts
Every first-time mom needs to know this—you will be making decisions for two people; yours and your baby's. And the only thing that will guide you to make correct judgments is your instincts.
Mommy instincts start growing once the newborn baby kicks in. They are there to guide you to be the best parent to your baby.
Sure, you can ask for advice if something doesn't feel okay. But remember, you don't have to listen to everything you are told. You are the only person who knows your baby better. So, trust your instincts to what you think is the best for your baby.
Are you about to be a mom? You might be interested in our blog post with 10 tips for expecting parents!
You Are Not Going To Be Broke
Many people do say you need to save a lot for a baby. But the reality is, a newborn baby only needs clothing, food, diapers, a place to sleep, and tons of love. Any other thing is a luxury. Don't let money stress you; you can afford the basic needs without having tons of money.
Babies care less about everything else until they are about three months. So, do not buy anything which you are not even certain whether your baby will like. Please wait until it arrives so that you can plan for your money smartly.
You Will Need Help
90% of what you will be doing in the first two months is holding your baby. You will be surprised how much one little human being can greatly consume your time. Sometimes, sleeping won't be easy either because most babies are sleepless at night.
I know you think you are the only one who knows how to care for your baby. But the thing is, depression springs up where there is discomfort. So, if anyone offers to help, don't hesitate. Trust them and take a quality nap, bath, or do anything to lift the extra weight off your chest.
*Related: The ultimate new mom care package: The best gifts for new moms!
Don’t Waste Your Time Reading About Pregnancy
Do you feel your pregnancy is stressing you more than normal?
Relax. That's just the beginning. Parenting will be more difficult than those episodes of baby kicks in your womb.
Facts about your pregnancy will not help your baby. All you need to do is devour healthily and be easy with things to do and avoid during pregnancy. Then, put more effort into preparing yourself to be a better parent.
Messes Will Be the New Norm
Are you that character that likes everything to fall into its rightful place? Wait until you become a new mom then you'll decide whether you will carry on with the tidiness.
The general disorganization, dishes in the sink, and loads of laundry in the dryer— you should expect all of them as a first-time mom. Make peace with things falling out of order because, in no time, your house will be back to its new normal.
*Related: 10 Must Haves Postpartum Essentials for Mom and Newborn
Go Easy on Yourself
Do you see that fear that comes when you're holding that tiny human? Don't be scared. You won't break them. They are not that breakable as they look; therefore, you have no absolute reason to be paranoid.
Besides, newborn babies are so noisy. The grunting, snuffling, crying, and heavy/irregular breathing might scare the hell out of you. But those are the things you should get used to in your new life, or else you will probably be crying just as much as they do.
It’s Okay To Say ‘NO’
You are now a mom. So, get used to saying that two-letter word.
Don't you want visitors right after birth? You don't want people to hold your baby? You don't agree with someone else's advice? There is no harm in declaring your stand. Please don't do things you don't want to; it's okay to be selfish. Give yourself time to heal and bond with your newborn baby.
Try Not To Feel Guilty
Mommy's guilt is the pressure of the should(s), supposed to(s), and other moms are. It is a prevalent hunch of not being/doing good enough o your baby, not doing things right, and more.
Those feelings of pervasiveness are natural; at least nine out of ten parents can testify to being through such experiences. Therefore, get comfortable forgiving yourself and take care of yourself first to properly care for your baby. Remember, a happy mom equals a joyful baby.
Enjoy every Moment!
Life is a bumpy road, and learning will never stop along the journey. If you are a first-time mom, do not cling to something that has already happened or has not yet happened. Please, take advantage of the present and live the best of it. Enjoy every moment today because you cannot do it twice!